Cooking tips

Today's the day (to my dismay)
For me to cook - I'm on the hook
It is my turn (I hope I've learned)
To cook the meat - and not to sweet!

To cook the fish with relish
To cook the ham with lamb
To cook the peas with all of these
The cooking man - that I am

I know I can do it
Great meals I make with ease
No matter what I've chosen to cook
I drench the thing in cheese

The very top-secret secret
I dare say if you please
Is to know whatever you cook
To dowse it all with cheese

Mamma taught me how to saute
And I learned from a monk to puree
On some days I will fricassee
But always always always with cheese

People all over the world
My name in the headlines they've heard
So approach me on bended knees
To ask of my skills with the cheese

I tell them they need to get up
Cooking is sometimes quite rough
Thick skin I believe you will need to get better
But even more important - some cheddar

Make tacos - you surely can't miss
If you cover the suckers with Swiss
If you cover your sturgeon with Gouda
You'll look like a culinary Buddha

If you want to do better than that
May I suggest Monterrey Jack?
A pretzel or some other snack
Delicious! Before the heart attack

Amid all the taunting it can be quite daunting
To be force to cook up a meal
But listen to me and I'm sure you'll agree
That with cheese its just not a big deal