A Talent For Chaos

 There once was a lad with initials DT
Who had a great talent you'll come to agree
You must understand the great pathos
That formed this dear lad who's the agent of chaos

Whatever he looked at whatever he saw
He found opportunity open and raw
He knew where to look to find its greatest flaw
In the case of America? Well it was the law

Of the law you will see he was full of distain
He hated so much that it seeped from his brain
So he went to the swamp and said "This I must drain"
And the people said "no" but he wouldn't refrain

And although we all knew it we couldn't resist
Was it the color of his hair or the size of his fist?
And he was quite open on all of his trysts
But it only made people join into his midst

He was purely chaos and exuded the aura
Didn't care for the Bible or even the Torah
Didn't care for the fauna or all of the flora
He looked like he'd come straight from Gomorrah

But you must understand that this simply was he
He wasn't a mouse or a bird or a bee
He wasn't a guy who would climb up a tree
He loved making chaos and did it with glee

Silly fruit puns

 

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Bad Fish Puns

1. According to Kermit the Frog, what kind of fish is only an illusion?
2. What kind of fish can you find in heaven?
3. What fish likes right triangles?
4. What fish keeps the neighbors up at night?
5. What fish chases mice?
6. What fish likes to run with peas?
7. What fish belongs in a non motor boat?
8. What fish works in the circus?
9. What fish can make you rich?
10. What kind of fish colonizes the world?
11. What kind of fish blows down houses?
12. What fish works at a college?
13. What fish is always in a bad mood?
14. What fish is in a band?
15. What kind of fish is very lucky?
16. What fish is best to sleep with?
17. What kind of fish can get Neo out of the Matrix?
18. What kind of fish would you rather eat than go to school with?
19. What kind of fish need the kiss of a princess?
20. What kind of fish are part of a common geometric construction?

Answers:

1. A rainbow fish (The Rainbow Connection)
2. Angel fish
3. Angler fish
4. A dog fish
5. A cat fish
6. A pi-ra-nha
7. A paddle fish
8. A clown fish
9. Gold fish
10. White fish
11. A huffer-puffer fish
12. A sar-dean
13. A snapper
14. A trumpet fish
15. Fluke
16. A cuddle (cuttle) fish
17. Red pill fish
18. Jerk fish
19. Toad fish
20. Tetra-hedron.

The quiet of the morning

In a quaint apartment, bit small but suits us fine
It nice to have a morning that is absolutely mine
Before the cars start honking, and while the kids still sleep
To watch the sunshine grow outside these moments rich and deep

To be alone with just ones thought before the day begins
To think of all our loses and to also count the wins
When everywhere around me seems to suddenly be still
Before the city wakes it fills my soul up with its chill

The real story of Pinocchio

There's a story they tell of a queer kind of toy
That has only one wish just to be a real boy
But I'll tell you sonny that there's more to the story
There's the tale of how Pinocchio rose to great glory

Yes it's true that deep down that his ultimate dream
Was to be a cute boy and to marry a queen
But before he could get there he knew in his head
That he'd need some money or he might go dead

So 'nocchio thought and he thought of a scheme
So great and impressive that he'd get the queen
To say "My my my! You're impressive indeed!
That you understand the importance of greed!"

'Cause before 'nocchio dreamt for his dream to come true
He had one or two other things he thought to do
"I think it'd be great to get rich really quick"
Thought `nocchio, "yes well I just need a trick"

And the trick that he found was as close as his nose
Because everyone knows how his nose grows and grows
That a lie and a lie and another would surely make him
The best source for wood for a house or a gym

So that's what he did yeah he lied and he lied
And oh how much wood that he daily supplied
And nobody no no one could deter his vim
'til one day all wood in the world came from him

And the money he made each and every day
Flowed right right down the road to the head of the bay
He had gorgeous clothes and a sparkling ring
He was really decked out and so fit to be king

And when he was set he transformed to a boy
And searched out the queen (she's the source of his joy)
And they married - They did! - for her heart he had won
And that is how `nocchio came to rule the kingdom

A Poem About "About"

Once there was a young girl with the name of what about
She liked to go to school and when she did she's scream and shout
But Saturdays she'd go to church she really was devout
A charming brash young lady all together all through out

All this may have you wondering hey hey what's this about?
Is all of this just nonsense `cause I really have a doubt
Is this leading anywhere if not that well baby I'm out

Don't show them your soul

It's great to be creative - To imagine something new.
But be a little wary - don't tell'em what you drew
A soul is so important - it's so simple and so true
But they will try to break it - when they see it in your school

There's people who might tell you - go ahead and innovate
But when you do you will find - that they'll burn you at the stake
If you are a creative one - beware there's those who'd rob
You of your thoughts and of your dreams - while you are at your job

And if you are a lefty - in a town that's full of red
You really ought'nt tell folks - you might just end up dead
And if you are a righty - in a city full of blue
You'll find so much tolerance - for everyone but you

Creativity is precious - given to us from the divine
But if you want to get along - you must just get in line